Anxiety Attack

Before the month ends, I'll be unemployed.

No back-up source of income to depend on... no definite plan.

And as the day draws nearer, I admit I'm getting scared.

It's the feeling of uncertainty and lack of control that usually scares us. Usually, I welcome this. I love getting lost during trips, simply because I love finding my way back, and I love discovering the unexpected.

But it's a little different when you lose your way on the road of life (I APOLOGIZE FOR THE CLICHE). Maybe it's just the label of "doing nothing" that scares me. I don't know how long I will be "doing nothing".

I gotta lay down my time line. As random as I like to do things, I still need some sort of a schedule.. you always need a plan, one way or another. So here are the things I know I want to accomplish as soon as I leave this poor excuse for a job:

• Search for scholarships and/or attainable job opportunities abroad, given my limited qualifications
• Fix my room as soon as Marla moves out
• Contact the travel mag to tell them I'm free
  
• Pick a month to live in Siargao and try the rural life
  
• Meet up with people from different industries and explore options
• Go even easier on the spending. Cut the cab rides and the big meals over P150. Choose your trips.

I should be excited. This is what it really means to be LOST anyway right? I shall welcome the possibility of absolutely anything, and also nothing at all. I'll learn something from this.

Something big will happen. Soon.